On breastfeeding

Wednesday, January 30, 2013

Bridger is now 3 months old and I finally feel like we have got the hang of breastfeeding. I thought I would share a few things I have learned the past few months!
***
I wrote those first two lines 3 months ago and never got around to writing anything until now. Bridger is now 6 months old (almost!), so I feel even better about writing this. This more of a journal entry about my experience with breastfeeding thus far: 

I was excited to start breastfeeding. I knew it would be the best thing for him, in so many ways. But I never got around to taking a class or even reading much about it. I looked at a few posters and some basics in What to Expect, but never dove into it like I should have. Or maybe it wouldn't have helped. I don't know.


So Bridger was born and I wanted to breastfeed him right away. When the time came, he wouldn't latch on. And he wouldn't latch on and he wouldn't latch on. The nurses brought around this amazing electric pump and then I fed him using a small syringe. (They were worried about giving him a bottle so early). The lactation consultant came around and I was so tired I was fighting to stay awake during her  lesson. The nurses were super helpful and gave me a lot of advice. They also stressed me out a lot by how they reacted to his/our lack of skill. But Bridger was so tired most of our hospital stay that he barely was awake enough to eat. (Was this because of my epidural??)

Anyway...I felt like such a newbie. When Bridger was a few days old, I remember sitting in our living room, topless (tmi? sorry.) and just breaking down in sobs. I couldn't do it. He was not latching on well. My nipples were pinched.  And it HURT. Where was the mother-child breastfeeding love connection I had heard about? Where was the sweet, natural moments I had dreamt of? Did I mention it HURT?!

Women have been doing this for centuries! What was wrong with me?? I was so worried that by not doing this for him, I would be a bad mother. Not true. But still, we couldn't afford formula! (Plus, I had this crazy mentality that formula was like baby-poison. So stupid. Don't worry, I have since changed my ways. Bridger gets a bottle of formula from time to time now if we go out and I didn't get to pump. I also use a little everyday now to mix his rice cereal).

I went back to the lactation consultant and she gave me a few more tips. She talked a lot about laid-back nursing. I learned it wasn't so much about what position he was laying. But it still hurt so much I teared up almost every time. (Using little hydro-gel pads really helped with the pain.)

Then I got cracked nipples. And then a clogged duct. And I almost gave up. But my stubbornness won out and I stuck with it. I went to another lactation consultant and she had some tips that really helped. Keeping his lips flayed open etc. I started feeling better.

And every nursing session got easier and easier. Suddenly and all at once around 3 months, nursing felt great. No pain. Just a sweet time for Bridger and for me. Now I know what my sisters were talking about. I love nursing. It's our special time. These moments are beautiful and goshdangit I was made to do this! We aren't amazing at it all the time. There are times when it can be frustrating. But I am so happy I stuck with it. 

So if you are having trouble with breastfeeding, you are not alone! And it gets better. I promise.

7 comments:

  1. Dude, I love this. I'm not having, at least as of now, that hard if time but Sam was soooo sleepy and full of amniotic fluid that he hardly ate for two days!! I didn't have dn epidural either so it may make babies sleepy but they are sleepy anyway! When I had him at my boob after he was born the nurse was like " look at his dimpled cheeks; he's just teasing" and that was that. No one seemed concerned, just said the max he should go was 6 hours those first two days without trying, then I should hand express and feed with a spoon. They also had me use a nipple shield at first and then another lactation consultant was like "you should wean him off that right away" (they all have different attitudes!) and it was frustrating, him 4 days old and I felt bad making it harder for him to eat! Plus it became more painful and frustrating for me too. But even if breastfeeding is sper natural, it's still a learned skill. Babies may have rooting and sucking reflexes but they've never breastfed before!! Just like we have boobs but never have used them to feed a baby! I didnt take class either and was panicing right before but luckily my hospital offered me all the help I needed so i felt better about that! Sorry for the novel / tmi but I am like...this is me, I'm in the trenches! Thanks for sharing!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks for sharing too! There really are so many different opinions on what helps vs. what doesn't. It really is a learned skill for both mom and baby!

      Delete
  2. So glad you stuck with it! It took me several weeks until I wasn't banging my head against the back of the couch while he latched and I let down. Like you said, now it is such a sweet experience every time! With Eden, I used a nipple shield until she has 4 months old. Every nurse told me not to. Whatever. I didn't listen and she got breastfed for 13 months and she got all the nutrients she needed. So there.
    Thanks for sharing your story and I'm glad you trusted your sisters:)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That is great about the shield and it not totally ruining every thing. (I'm joking). I didn't want I have to put it on every time I nursed but one nurse said a few weeks would be fine, another acted like I would never get him to nurse without it...

      Delete
    2. Mitzi thanks for sharing too! We are the experts on our kids. :) You just have to keep working until you find what works for each kid.

      Delete
  3. This is so true. We're only two months in and I've thought about quitting so many times, but I promised myself I'd keep at it for at least 3 months since that's when most people seem to say it clicks. It's funny how everyone struggles with something different. Our issue has been thrush and it's driving me crazy, but we're finally figuring it out and I'm so glad I've stuck with it. There are still times when I am going crazy, but there are also those sweet sweet times when everything seems perfect. Also, I've been stalking your blog for a while now, I love it!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Laura, a wise experienced mom told me to make a goal of doing it for 3 months and then re-evaluate if needed at that point. Right around 3 months, it really clicked. So keep on truckin! I'm so sorry you had to deal with thrush! Best of luck to you!! And thanks, I'm glad you like my blog! That made my day :)

      Delete

Lacey Parr All rights reserved © Blog Milk - Powered by Blogger