Screen-free(ish) kids

This isn't meant to be advice, just an explanation of what's working for our family right now. I'm sure things will change and we will adjust as time goes on. Right now and for the past year, this has been working really well for us.

Screen-free(ish) kids 100% entertained by watching baked potatoes cook :D

Screens in our home:

My iPhone

Nate's iPhone

Desktop computer

Mini DVD player

TV

Friday Night Movie Night

So about a year and a half ago, we changed our family rules on screens and it has been going really well. Up until then, we had a couple alphabet apps for them and allowed a show or two just about every day. But every time it was time to turn it off, we had a complete meltdown on our hands. Can't remember what or who inspired it, but we started a weekly movie night and deleted all the kid apps. No shows, movies, Netflix or apps for the kids all week. This has been marvelous for our family. They look forward to movie night and no longer beg to watch a show. Meltdowns and tantrums have decreased. Their imaginative play has increased. They don't reach for my phone when they are bored when we are out and about. Instead, they play together. They make up games. And the boys know to bring a book when we leave for errands. 

Full disclosure

We are not super strict about this. A couple times a week I might turn on Daniel Tiger or Octonauts for them while I shower. But because we have developed this great habit of limited screens over the past year, they are fine when it's time to turn it off. 

Last week in the airport and hotel room, they probably watched Empire Strikes Back like 5 times. Whatever. I don't have any guilt for that. The great thing was when we got home, they willingly put away the mini DVD player and were happy to be back to their Legos. 

Minnesota winters are long and cold. We have had movie night more than once a week lately and we still feel really good about that. Especially when its a nature documentary. The important thing is, we made limited screen time over the past several months very intentional.

And we definitely use my phone and the desktop to show them videos or other things that we are studying.

The TV

When we got married, we basically said we would never get a TV. We saw no need for it. Cable is a rip-off in our opinion. Streaming works great for us, no need for a giant screen. Well when we moved here, Nate's brother upgraded to a bigger TV and gave us this one. I kept it in the basement until recently. One day we will get a sectional or something for down there. But for now, it's comfier on the main floor to watch our weekly movie. And Planet Earth is so much better on a big screen :). But I'm a dumby and cannot figure out how to use the old xBox to stream things. So we are limited with the TV to when Nate is home, haha. Works for me!

Adult screen time

Seeing how well the kids do off screens reminds us how important it is for us to do the same. I think it's impossible to be completely screen free. It's how we communicate with family and other adults. But it's obvious to both of us how distracted we can be with our phones. I've been aware I've been using social media too much for a long time and finally started pulling back recently. I don't know if I'll go back to Instagram. I miss seeing updates from friends there, but I don't miss the endless scrolling and the fakery and coordinated/posed photos. (I'm guilty of that too!) Nate doesn't use social media but streams Netflix a lot on his phone when home. He's made efforts lately to slow down on that and he loves the results. Both of us are trying to be more intentional together about making personal changes. Next up is deleting FB off my phone and only using it 1-2x a day like the old days on the desktop. 

Looking back
This is more or less what my parents had us do growing up! We weren't allowed shows during the week. We did not have Gameboys or any gaming system. No computers or TVs in our rooms. We totally snuck cartoons, and later, MTV before mom got home from work but overall, I think mom and dad's guidelines for us had positive results.

Resources
Great advice on screens: "Enjoy screens. Not too much. Mostly together."via NPR
50 Ways to Unplug
Screentime recommendations for children

Social media is shaping your body
If happiness is the goal for teens, screen limits are the path